Tuesday, March 31, 2020

Yes, things have been lost

We must admit that we have suffered a loss.

Many, in fact.


Grandfathers and grandmothers. Parents. Siblings. Best friends. They have died. Been taken from us by a killer none of us knew about just a few short months ago.

By now we all know of coronavirus - COVID-19. It has disrupted life in ways small and large.

None bigger than the actual ending of life. We grieve along with those who have suffered this loss of life. Words cannot express what they feel, what we feel, how both parties ache.

Some of these losses will haunt those who have lost. They could not be present because of hospital rules and significant concerns about who might be infected. So some of those we have lost were alone. And that hurts and haunts and brings us to our knees.

And there are other losses.

A high school senior year disrupted.

Prom? Probably gone.

Graduation? Up in the air. Almost gone. More than likely altered at least.

The spring sports team? Probably done. 

The final band, orchestra, choir concert? The final dance? The scholarship breakfast? The senior picnic, last day of school? All hang in the balance.

No matter how many people say we will get through this, that we will look back on this and remember the lessons that we learned, what we know now is that we have lost.

So let us give ourselves time to grieve. To ache. To let our hearts break.

It is OK.

We can't stay here forever. At some point we must pick up and move on.

But right now, we can hurt. Don't tell me there is a silver lining, a lesson to be learn, that it is part of a bigger plan.

Just sit with me. Share my pain. Let me know that you care. Let me know that you understand . . . that things have been lost.

Be quiet. Be kind. Be there.

1 comment:

  1. Hello; I am trying to figure out if this site is legitimately from Steve Matthews from Novi School District. Several seniors are sharing this link with each other and their reactions are pretty intense. They perceived this message to be the superintendent's communication of the cancellation of their graduation and prom (though I can see your language is supposed to be hypothetical). I assured my senior that nothing has been officially canceled (2:29 PM on 3/31), and if it was, it would communicated quite differently, and you definitely would not include the tagline "Be quiet..." in that official communication. I appreciate your sentiment and your right to muse out loud, but it's hard for a 17-year-old to see past their own heightened emotions to recognize another person is also sharing their grief. I don't really blame them for reacting strongly. Reading "Prom? Probably gone"; "Graduation? Up in the air." and ending with "Be quiet" didn't sit well with me either. This situation is hard. I don't envy the messages you will have to share in the coming days, or the decisions you must make. I share your pain. I also share my senior's pain and this hurt them. I know that was not your intent.